Throwback to the days when all you did was exist and nothing else. When all you had to do for yourself was breathe. Those days are hazy now because I bet you cannot remember how your mother’s breast milk tastes like right? Way back when your entire existence was paid for by your parents they had exclusive power on all the choices in your lives. They had a say on the major things like schools, place of residence; down to the trivial things like the brand of toothpaste to be used. As the years rolled by they began to leave some of the decisions to you like the color of t-shirt you want to wear and with time you get slapped with heavy decisions to make and suddenly you wonder why you were in such a hurry to grow up.
As a human being you are endowed with will; it is what differentiates you from your pet, the stray cats and dogs in your neighborhood and all members of the animal kingdom. The will is what comes into play when faced with a choice to make. For my Christian brothers and sisters we know that Adam and Eve had will and when faced with the choice to eat the forbidden fruit they chose to go ahead and eat it, to go ahead and disobey the Almighty, to go ahead and fuck it up for us their dear descendants. Fast forward back to your childhood days when you were in the supermarket with your parents and you make the choice of a candy and because your parent is well aware of the cavity it will leave in your teeth and their bank account, they decline to buy it for you and there you are throwing a tantrum and if your parents were African enough especially your mother she would silence you with a look that forecasted mayhem on your backside if you continued with your shenanigan. In time as you get older they start giving you money and you realize that that candy can wait as there are better ways to spend your cash.
It is the similar case with us today; adulting is coupled with a lot of decision making. From the moment you snap your eyes open to the time they shut you are constantly making a choice and as cliché as it is, these choices affect your future. Which is the shitty part because how were you to know that an innocent choice like that one to try one shot of liquor could set you up as an alcoholic later? How could you have known that a simple remark could spin someone into degenerated mental health? (P.S: let us be sensitive to others please, online and offline) How could you have known that the simple choice of taking a different route home could have resulted in you being mugged? You now silently curse the free will and wish you were a cow, a real one, not the one you probably are to your parents.
You almost wish you had your parents’ foresight on issues or any sort of guidance or the power to travel back and forth in time to either correct an action or see if it works out or just maybe an algorithm to help you decide if sleeping an extra five minutes will ruin you. There has been no proven way to be certain that the choices we make each passing day will be sure bets. Sometimes it helps that the choice you made failed you. Trust me you are wiser than the time you chose to open a hot lid with your bare hand. You are wiser than the time you chose to trust a certain someone with your heart. There are those things you learned from that experience that make you wiser the next time around. We live and we learn and that is the bitter-sweet aspect of being human.
Being one-track-minded like animals would not be bad but having control over life is much better. Lions cannot wake up one morning and be like today they want to try this grass the gazelles were praising that day at the waterhole. However, you can wake up and chose to change that boring course being forced on you. You can wake up and chose to seek the thrill you always wanted. You can chose to follow Nina Simone’s advice and leave the table when love is no longer being served. Having the will to choose is power and sometimes power can make or break you but choose to learn and not repeat the awful choice that landed you in that dark hole. You may never be the same but being human is to be dynamic and continuously growing; whether up, outgrowing stuff or growing tired choosing things that will not get you anywhere.
If adulting had a handbook I think choices would be a chapter that would be essential not to leave out.