Are you always looking at people accomplishing things? Ah! Me too. If this is not the hardest adulting problem that was ever invented then I don’t know why in the heavens it is so hard to not be bothered with the fact that others are making millions as you make ugali mayai.
As I eat my ugali mayai, I am just asking myself, “Wamuchere, what have you accomplished or planning to accomplish?” But because the ‘mayai’ is over, I head to the kitchen kwa mwendo wa aste aste ambao unawezamfanya mzee kobe anionee wivu only to find that the eggs are over and now I have to eat karanga-chapo. I sit down and tell myself that haina noma and that I should just do me. No sooner had I told myself ‘just do you’ than I opened Instagram just to see the amazing things everyone’s up to. Some have Youtube channels, some are travelling like every other day, some are making money with their businesses, some are studying in Stanford and have just met with the UN Secretary General and I’m like oh snap, am I supposed to want that too?
It is honestly confusing and quite frustrating at times because at one time you can be so proud of your milestones but the minute you see your friend who dropped out of school is making millions/becoming famous as a footballer, you begin to doubt if what you’re pursuing is really worth it. Other times you don’t know what you want and when you realize that there are so many people who are settling for stuff (that they don’t want), you somehow convince yourself to do the same.
Now let me put my karanga-chapo aside and take some maziwa mala because it’s about to get heavy. I have previously quoted this in another article (kama hujasoma unangoja kuku ikuwe mbuzi, ama?) “If you compare yourself with others,you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be a greater and lesser person than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble: it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.” I know it’s not a step by step process on how to be proud of your achievements without feeling intimidated by other people’s achievements, but it can be words that you manifest until you believe in the power of your own path, whatever that path is.
Trust me , I am still learning to appreciate my accomplishments because I mean, I’m adulting just like you are and I have no particular formulae of working this out- even after spending sleepless nights doing Calculus ugh.
While we are on this topic, we need to talk about procrastination. There’s the kawaida “I will do this tomorrow and when tomorrow comes you push it to the next day then kidogo kidogo tuko Easter na Yesu akafufuka wewe bado una Pass-over vitu lol. Wachana na hiyo. I am talking about this type of procrastination where you’re busy doing other things other than what you want to achieve as a way of ignoring your priorities (for reasons best known to you). Yani, kazi ni kuenda Klabu unachapa sahani mbili za ugali matumbo alafu bak bandika unajipata uko photo shoot mbele ya statue ya Dedan Kimathi alafu bak bandua uko Archives unaserereka na watu wa promotion; while in actual sense your goal was to go to town, get fabric to design a trouser suit for Swale Mdoe. Now that you know this is what you normally do, stop what you’re doing and gimme 150 squats. Go!
I hope you’re reading this part as you do those squats. One thing I am certain of is that sometimes you’re dissatisfied with your path/achievements because:
- You lack interest in what you do
- You have not owned/personalized your path
This in turn means that you’re doing things just for the sake but not because what you’re doing means anything to you. At this juncture, I would really like to remind you (and me) to find what sets your soul on fire. This is definitely not a one day job but many adulting days job.
…you nah mean?
It’s an open forum so feel free to share your thoughts because like I said, we are in the same SGR na hata kama wengine wako First Class na wengine wako Economy si bado tutafika Mombasa saa tisa za mchana?